Posted in Uncategorized

Dark night of the soul

Honesty, courage and authenticity.

These are the things that get to the heart of everything. Emotions become intensely and keenly felt as one revisits the pains, wounds and traumas that one has gone through in the past that have been buried and repressed over the years, which, if ignored or dismissed or not dealt with, may resurface surreptitiously in the most unexpected ways and at the most unexpected times.

The dark night of the soul is painful but necessary. It brings rain that cleanses. A sense of relief follows.

On the other hand, being in a public platform, whether it be a workshop or chat group, seems different, based on my experience in attending workshops on how to be successful. The sense of positivity seems predictable after a while, even manufactured. Maybe there is a place for such positivity, even if it appears trite and formulaic. Who wants to be sitting in a seminar room and be faced with awkward silence and forced smiles when learning about how to be successful and wealthy? (But being in a mindfulness meditation session is another thing altogether, for cultivating silent contemplation is encouraged, but that’s probably another story for another day.) Thus, I can imagine that the speaker would have to gather the inspiration within in order to carry out the workshop in such positive and empowering manner. In addition, by expressing positivity and gratitude, they egg one another on to go further in life. We all have to start somewhere, even if it looks obligatory and formulaic.

Still, there is something about the dark night of the soul that grabs the heart in a way that no amount of positive thinking seminars can do –  it enables the soul to feel and express its sheer rawness, its unedited feelings, its primal cry to be heard and acknowledged in the universe. I believe that the psalmists took to writing precisely to experience such catharsis.

Perhaps Henri Nouwen said it best:

“What we live in the most intimate places of our beings is not just for us but for all people. That is why our inner lives are lives for others. That is why our solitude is a gift to our community, and that is why our most secret thoughts affect our common life.”

Advertisements
Posted in Uncategorized

Can a nerd love himself and be successful in life?

I came across an ad on my Facebook newsfeed this morning, and decided to read it. It was liked by my mentor’s mentor, and I usually respect her views. The ad contains a link to a blog, in which the writer wrote:

“I grew up a bully victim…

….

Believe it or not, I was a bully victim during my younger days, and I’m always laughed at for my dreams for being who I want to be. I must thank the bullies from those days, without them, I might have entered their “clique” and might have never become the person I am today, helping my students create such radical results for their business and freedom in their lives, build long lasting relationship with their loved ones and take their life to the next level year after year.”

(How One Discovery Turn Me from a Broke Consultant To Charge 20K Per Client)

I could certainly relate to that – especially the fact that he looked like a nerd in his profile photo, bespectacled and all. I was and am still a nerdy nerd.

Indeed, growing up as a nerd, I have come to see that in society’s eyes, a nerd is usually seen as an oddball, a reject, a misfit, a nobody, a loser, often dismissed as someone who is socially inept, awkward looking and unattractive. For a nerd to rise to become someone who is respected, influential and wealthy is nothing short of a miraculous transformation.

“If a nerd can un-nerd (and unnerve) himself and be a successful speaker and influencer, so can I,” was my thought.

It brings me back to the lesson on self-love and self-acceptance. Maybe I should write a book called “I love myself – the quietest, simplest and most powerful revolution ever”.

 

 

 

 

Posted in Uncategorized

Thoughts on workshops

So far, in three of the workshops that I attended, the speaker asked the people in the audience to be the first one to come up and take the money or trade it. The result is people rushing forward to take the money. 

I understand that they want to bring across the point “successful people take action”, but it seems a rather crude way to bring home this point. In fact, the speakers may be indirectly shaming those who decided to not come up to take the money. 

There are a number of reasons why some choose not to take action in this scenario:

  • Having to scramble to get money can be rather demeaning and insulting. 
  • We choose to give chance to others who want the money, and we trust that there are other ways or opportunities to get money. 
Posted in Uncategorized

Searching for the financial elixir

Be it an elixir or windfall or golden goose, it is a miracle that I am seeking, in order to increase my cashflow so that I can clear debts, meet my family needs and build a sustainable future, which can enable me to stay afloat in the face of rising costs of living, economic crises, etc. Nothing fancy or overly ambitious, as I am not seeking to be wealthy and famous for its own sake. I basically want to make ends meet, and along the way, be a greater blessing to others as well.

In recent months, I have been attending one seminar after another in seek of solutions. I learn about new ways of looking at things, new opportunities to make extra income, and so on. I also learn about the importance of knowing myself, developing a resilient mindset and setting realistic goals.

Which seminars have I found most helpful so far?

First and foremost, I understand that every opportunity to make money has its strengths and challenges, and every seminar speaker has their strengths and limitations. One of the traits I look for in them is compassion and empathy. At first, I thought that those who had faced poverty or bankruptcy or huge debts in the past would be more emphatic and helpful. Indeed, during their workshop, they would share about the difficult times they went through, and how they felt grateful to their mentors for having helped them pull through and break through to become the success that they are today. But it seems that most of them do not really intend to reach out to the ones who are struggling financially, as they expect people to pay a fair bit of money in order to attend their intensive workshops.

Fair enough, I understand that renting workshop spaces, marketing their workshops and hiring event management personnel to handle the administrative aspects of their workshops do cost a fair bit of money as well. Still, I have my own reservations. I would want to look at how these speakers are living their lives on a daily basis. Are they actively seeking to help people achieving financial breakthroughs or mentor them to become more successful, or are they getting carried away by their own success and posting on social media about their next dream vacation or their hobnobbing with the who’s who in the celebrity circles?

In addition, after doing some soul searching, I am coming to realise that my passion has to be involved in the venture instead of merely following the strategies to make money because otherwise, I might as well continue to do a 9-to-5 job. For example, do I really like the idea of selling ebooks without having to write my own books? While it is possible to hire a ghost writer to do the job for me, the satisfaction of selling the book wouldn’t be the same as that of selling my own self-written book. The same question can be asked if I want to consider other ways of making money, whether it be property investment, internet marketing, email marketing, affiliate marketing, value investing, online business, and so on.

At this point, therefore, I have narrowed down my options to the areas in which I am passionate and knowledgeable about: namely, online tea business and education business (specifically, Genius IQ Smart Parenting Seminar).